Actually, aphids are pretty cute

Who's this then?

The story, in brief: I spent a Friday night in alone with a vice, a hacksaw, and a bottle of prosecco. The result was this—a wee aphid friend.

I'll stop burying the lede. I'd seen an article about how to hack your iPhone to make a macro lens, so I decided to give it a go. (It's easy, if you don't mind purchasing tools that make you look dangerous.) After poking around photographing feathers, coins, and the carpet, I decided to grab some foliage from outdoors and discovered this little stowaway. 

I filmed it using an iPhone 5S, modified with a laser pen lens—once you've hacked a laser pen apart you can use a bobby pin to fix the lens in place over your smartphone camera. Et voilà.

So, what did I learn about aphids?

The rumours I know you've all heard are true: aphids are milked—farmed, even—by certain species of ants for their sugary goodness. It's a mutually beneficial relationship because the ants stroke their antennae. (JK, the ants protect them. But they do stroke their antennae to milk them.)

Interesting fact: Female aphids can choose to clone over reproducing. I know there's a lame joke in there somewhere about "amirite ladies", but I'm just not willing to write it. They’re pretty feisty too—they use those chunky back legs to smash-kick predators and even destroy their eggs.

I'm now quite the fan, even if they chew something rotten out of my mother's roses. Plus, slow-mo aphids to Fleetwood Mac might be one of my actual favourite things.